Myrrh has written a series of posts on why she gave up Facebook. As a fellow INFJ personality person, I so understood what she was talking about. I have avoided Facebook like the plague because I know for me and my personality it would be a nightmare. Reading her series just further solidified my thinking on the subject.
In writing about introverts in general and INFJs more specifically, she wrote this little gem in Part 4. I sent her an email and said she must have been living in my head the past few months because this is exactly the kind of stuff I was alluding to when I wrote recently about choosing a direction for my blog:
Ironically, in her inner world, her creativity is forever procrastinated as it’s nickeled and dimed to death eeking itself out in status updates and blurbs instead of being channeled into carefully crafted prose. And in her online life, she struggles with the tension between her need for privacy and her need for transparency, her desire to connect and her desire to withdraw, her urge to communicate and her desire to be restrained.
That last sentence sums up my blogging experience of the past four years very well. And the first sentence sums up my struggle between blogging for the love of connecting with others and the reality that I am a professional writer and need to channel my writing efforts into pieces that reflect well on me (and our business) as a writer and also pay so as to justify the time I spend writing here.
I highly recommend reading the whole Part 4 at least. Introverts will be blessed to know they are not alone and extroverts will learn something about how the other half lives and thinks.
As much as I hate the internet sometimes, thank God (literally and truly) that it gives us the opportunity to connect with other people who have the same ideas and struggles. 
I have recently checked out Facebook since several of my family members are on it. I thought it was fun to see the pictures my family have posted and I enjoy hearing what they are up to (as many of them live in Canada and I’m in the States). However, I quickly realized that Facebook was not for me and as a fellow INFJ, I appreciated reading why others may not “click” with the online social networking thing too.
I’m really enjoying Facebook. As an INTJ, who also struggles with agoraphobia, Facebook is a nice way to stay in touch! I could NEVER have had it when my kids were small. NEVER. But, things are different for me now.
My favorite use for Facebook is the ability to send ONE message to my adult children and nieces and nephews and not have to worry about whether or not they got the message. So the holidays are all planned way in advance and birthdays are remembered.
Many times I will admit that I feel a little bit like the lady in the short story “The Machine Stops”. Then I remember that I LIKE to go outside.
Thank you for the post and the link. I feel better now.
I have a Facebook account only to communicate with my two children. No kidding. It was their idea.
I do have a few other Friends, a couple who moved far away and a few who have ministry updates.
My son (who is a Computer Science major) tells me studies have been done about Facebook that indicate the number of Friends one has on Facebook is directly the opposite as they have in real life.
He has found that to be true, he thinks it is probably because people who have less Friends on Facebook get out into real life more (especially teenagers and college students).
One huge difference to this is the group of people involved in ministry. My daughter and son-in-law’s college pastor is now involved in an international ministry and he has something like 1,500 to 2,000 Friend who keep up with them through Facebook.
I have yet to understand Twitter. Maybe I’m just of a different generation ?
By the way… great football game!
We’ve already given up and looking forward to the basketball season. Sigh…
This is so incredibly helpful to hear. Thank you.
I wish I had never gone on Facebook!
I ended up quitting.
WOW. I’m also an INFJ and this quote describes so exactly why I quit blogging and facebook that it is truly eerie.
I was thinking more about my Facebook fail and the fact that I’m an introvert (INTJ).
First up, I couldn’t stand all of the meaningless chatter and status updates from people I was never going to see again. I would rather have one true friend than 100 acquaintances. There is a reason friends fade out of your life, it is natural and healthy. It’s not natural to be tethered to them for life.
And then if I did post a Status Update, I would get hurt if people didn’t comment on it because I had actually put thought into it.
Then, I basically stopped using it anyway, for myself, because I didn’t feel comfortable shouting out my feelings like that to the world. Then everyone else, minus a few folks, stopped using it too.
I also got hurt on a few occasions, I would see pictures of a party I wasn’t invited to, or learn that a friend had come home and didn’t call me to see her, that kind of thing. Things that I wouldn’t have known pre-Facebook.
I fantasize about going back in time, to the days before the internet (and yes, I’m old enough to remember them!). I’m not sure the internet has been a force for good. I do enjoy it, no doubt, but I think we were all fine before it.
Wow! As an INFJ myself, I am in total agreement with that quote up there! As you know, I’ve struggled with those very issues for quite some time. Thanks for the heads up on this! I don’t do Facebook and quit Twitter.
Whew, Sallie, thanks for that link! Oh, and before I forget, did you have a post at A Gracious Home mentioning you were an INTJ? I remember that was the first time I ran across the Myers-Briggs personality profiles, but perhaps I’m not remembering correctly what you mentioned yours was there.
I’m an INFJ and knew of every little thing Myrrh C. was talking about; that tug of war, the need fulfilled by passing friends comments and the occasional rejection when the little red notifications box reflects silence. On the whole, I would have to say that Facebook had been a real blessing to me and a means of facilitating building relationships in real life (not in front of the computer.
) and I don’t regret that one bit.
Having said that though, I am currently taking a sabbatical from Facebook for a season, the Lord making it clear that it was His idea for me for a while. And while it has bordered on addicting in the past (the checking, checking, checking for some outside communication while you’re home alone with small children), there really haven’t been too many withdrawals.
And now, having said that, I actually wouldn’t discourage Facebook, as it has allowed friendships that never would have been otherwise. And I haven’t touched Twitter… and don’t plan to.
Apologies for the late reply, but…WOW! I read the article and comments, and you all have a lot of interesting opinions on the subject of Facebook.
As an ISFJ (not too far off!), Facebook has been something of a mixed blessing for me. My theory is that if you enjoy class reunions, like making “small talk,” and enjoy talking about yourself and feel proud of your accomplishments in life, you’ll love Facebook — and I think most people who feel like that tend to tilt more to the extrovert side of the equation.
I’ve reconnected with some people from my past, which has actually led to some very good actual face-to-face reunions! On the other hand, FB has also made me realize that I live a pretty boring and uninteresting life compared to my peers, and I don’t think it’s the best format for sharing intimate and personal details of my life!